Sure, Christmas is still fun, but let’s
face it…it was way better when you were back in school.
Nowadays you’re all too aware of the
whole commercial aspect of it, and you begrudge having to pay extra for your
normal coffee just because they’ve added a little cinnamon to it.
Instead you long to go back in time,
back to the good old days when you were in school, and Christmas was the
highlight of your entire year.
1. PAR-TAY
The end of term party was the social
event of the entire academic year. You remember the sheer joy of walking into
the classroom to see all the tables cleared out the way to make room for a
makeshift dance floor so you could play musical statues whilst dancing to I
Wish it Could be Christmas Every Day.
What do you have now? Leaving work early
on Christmas Eve? Not good enough.
2. Christmas disco
If your school was a bit more festive
then you were lucky because you got to revel in the delights of the Christmas
disco. Typically this would take place between the hours of 5.30pm – 7.30pm and
it would involve tinsel, mince pies and the PE teacher donning a Father
Christmas outfit. Way better than the office Christmas do when someone always
does something inappropriate and you end up with the hangover from hell.
3. Movie time
It would appear that your teachers had
an unspoken rule that as soon as it hit December, there was no need for you to
follow the curriculum. Instead, you were treated to frequent movie sessions.
Why learn about the Victorians, when you
could watch Home Alone and learn how to effectively tackle a home invasion?
4. Party rings
All we’re saying is that when you were
at school a packet of party rings was never far away. Now all you have to look
forward to is some semi-stale mince pies at work that if you’re lucky a
co-worker may save for you.
5. Sense of community
There was a real sense of everyone
pulling together in order to make the most of all things festive, what with
teachers decorating their classrooms, and encouraging pupils to bring in food
for the end of year Christmas party. Now a Christmas card is all you can hope
for.
6. Non-uniform day
This day was your chance to show off the
best outfit and the more Christmas themed it was, the better. Now you have to
take part in the ritual humiliation that is Christmas jumper day at work, which
brings unjustifiable levels of stress as you accept having to pay a lot of
money for a jumper you look like an idiot in.
7. Father Christmas visit
Regardless of whether you still
believed, or if your grumpy parents had broken the news to you, there was a
special kind of magic in the assembly hall when Father Christmas popped
up. You still remember the anticipation of waiting in line, before you got your
chance to try and convince him that you had been really good all year, and to
ignore anything that your teacher said. Plus the toy was always semi-decent.
8. Making cards
No more homemade glittery creations for
you. Now you just about remember to post ‘Merry Christmas’ on someone’s
Facebook wall.
9. Nativity time!
The whole school would be gripped with
excitement and suspense when the cast list for the annual Nativity play was
announced. You dreamed of having a starring role, but instead your artistic
capabilities were overlooked and you were allocated the role of a sheep. But it
was still better than live tweeting your family Christmas Day argument, because
that’s all the drama you get to experience now.
10. Winding down
There was none of this expectation to be
grateful to your boss because they let you leave an hour early on Christmas
Eve. Back in school you experienced the full meaning of winding down for the
festive season by essentially switching off from December 1st, and then having
a good few weeks off to stuff your face, and play with all your gifts.
11. Paper snowflakes
Gone are the days of spending a whole
art lesson on figuring out how to make the most prettiest snowflake you could,
and despite only cutting small shapes into a folded piece of paper you felt
like Van Gogh when you stuck it to the window. The furthest you can go now is
getting a USB Christmas Tree to pop on your desk.
12. Decorations
Come the first week of December your
classroom looked like Santa’s workshop, with all the tinsel, fake snow, paper
rings and Christmas trees. Now if you put anything Christmas related on your
desk, you will be judged for being an eager beaver by colleagues. And some
anti-Christmas grump will come over and ask you to remove it, because
apparently your flashing fairy lights are a distraction.
13. Gifts
As a kid you received gifts that made
you so excited you were sure that your head would explode, and you probably
circled them in the Argos catalogue as a massive hint to your parents. These
sorts of gifts included space hoppers, anything Power Rangers related and a new
PS 1. Now what do you get? Tacky gift sets that you have no use for.
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